Monday, October 26, 2009

A Shining Butthole

That lovely title got your attention, dinnit? Ha-ha-ha. Sorry about that. Oh, who am I kidding? I'm not sorry about that at all! I think it's funny. If you're offended by it, get over yourself and go away. And then go farther away. A little farther please, I can still see you.

Fletch is obviously not happy with me taking a picture of his butt for the whole world to see, but he's a good dog and stood there anyway. You can just see the question on his face. Why are you taking a picture of my butt, Momma? Are you for real?

This picture should be clickable so you can get a better look at what I'm talking about, but I've said that before and the clicking didn't work so who knows. And why would you even want to see his butthole any better anyway? And furthermore, why do I even want to share a story like this with you, you might ask? A good question for which I have no good answer. I'm weird, okay?

And some people reading here get really-really-really bored with my crochet talk all the time, so the butthole story is for them. Heh-heh. That'll teach you to be bored with me!

Barnaby and I are quite disturbed by the fact that whomever docked Fletch's tail got a bit carried away and cut it WAY too short. Why would they do that? Why? Why? But because someone got carried away or sneezed or Fletch moved or whatever, we now have to see his shining little butthole all day every day for the rest of his life.

AND, AND, AND...when he can't quite wipe his own butt well enough and he has a little leftover poo or grass clinging to poo or WHATEVER ELSE comes out of little holes like that, WE have to wipe it away or look at it all day until he accidentally wipes it on a rug or couch or our clothes. We choose to help him and wipe it away.

Are you totally grossed out and hating me yet?

My pain shall be your pain, people. I'm a giver.

Now, hopefully to wipe (pardon the pun) those horrid images from your delicate minds, I'll show you some crochet beauty. These pictures should be clickable too, but no promises.


I totally forgot about this crochet project and never shared it with you. I showed you the Noro Kureyon Sock Yarn when I bought it, but I didn't show you what I made with it. I still have that itty-bit of yarn to go before it's complete, but it's close enough.

This is Angela Best's Spring Ripple Pattern. I used a size E crochet hook. A little tip if you use this pattern: Don't bother with the written instructions. Use the graph instead. I found the written instructions extremely confusing. I'm not a big crochet graph reader either, but it was much easier to follow and things clicked right along after that. Read the written instructions just for the info and as a guide.

3 comments:

  1. You are totally cracking me up this morning. It take a lot to offend me. It must be a Monday morning, as I am sort of off a little in my humor today too.

    Love the scarf.... so what other goodies do you have hidden away to show us.

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  2. Oh my God!!!!! I am laughing so hard right now, I've literally got tears in my eyes! Hunter just got home and is sitting in my recliner right behind me, reading her library book. I started snickering when I first started reading, and she asked me what I was reading. I said, "Oh, Pammy Sue, that crazy girl!" She wanted to know what you said, and I told her she would just have to read it herself (now that she can get back on the computer)! By the middle of the post, I was cackling (and crying). That poor dog, what were they thinking anyway? And, no, I did NOT enlarge the picture. I think you gave a good enough description, and I have a pretty vivid imagination. Thanks for the laugh. I really needed that today!

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