Friday, March 27, 2009

More of Me-Me-Me!

Good heavens, I had a horrible day yesterday emotionally. I cried all morning because, boo-hoo, poor me, blah-blah-blah. None of it was real, but it felt real at the time.

Do you want to know what the problem is?

No?

Well, too bad, cuz I'm saying it anyway...

About a month ago, I had the BIG bright idea to wean myself off of a certain medicine I'm taking. You know, the one I've talked about before that keeps me from thinking everyone hates me and I hate them too, and I get panicky in social situations, and I'm a bitch one minute and all lovey-dovey the next, and I hate myself, and I get depressed, and I marry some guy and move to Boise, Idaho, and I'm just generally insane?

Yeah, that one.

Well, I got myself down to 75 mg per day instead of the 225mg I was taking with no perceived problems other than I wasn't leaving the house much (which I normally don't do anyway, but it was a tad worse). There were probably other things going on that I didn't notice myself.

And then two days ago happened and all hell broke loose inside my head. I guess. I don't know. Anyway, I've been on an emotional roller coaster and rather crazy the last three days. Good thing I don't go anywhere.

So the next time I am struck with what I think is a moment of brillance and think I don't need my medicine anymore, I hope I remember this. Nobody else can remind me because I didn't tell anybody this time and probably won't the next time either. Not even Barnaby knew.

(I just had to stop typing because a dog just shit underneath my desk. You wish you were me, don't you?)

Anyway, where was I? Oh, yeah. I just read this and sound crazy. I'm really not, though...maybe.

Okay, enough of that.

************************************

Speaking of cleaning up dog shit...my cleaning lady just told me that last time she was here, she watched Fletcher hike his leg and pee on a corner wall. And then he went over to her basket of rags, picked one out, and took it over to his pee puddle and dropped it on top!

I'm telling you, he's making himself sandwiches and popping popcorn at night while we're asleep. I just know it.

Mr. Smarty-Pants Fletch says, "Don't listen to her, Momma. She's lying!"

1 comment:

  1. Crissy used to stop taking her meds from time to time and I could ALWAYS tell. Then she'd come to me with some strange problem and I'd say, "Crissy, are you taking your medicine?" And she'd say, "How can you tell I'm not?" Duh Crissy. But I guess, she really didn't think she was doing anything weird. So, she'd get back on her meds and after a few weeks, I'd say, "Have you noticed you aren't experiencing blah de blah anymore?" And she'd say, "Oh yeah, I didn't notice it until you mentioned it just now....huh..." And that would last until the next time she'd decide to wean herself off and start acting strange again. It was exhausting for me so I can imagine how bad it was for her. Hope you are getting back on your regular dosage again.

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