I’ve been having some pretty deep discussions with someone online I don’t even know. If you can call emailing back and forth “discussions,” that’s what we’re doing. I have been reading his blog for awhile now, just lurking and reading without commenting. I rarely ever leave a comment on anyone’s blog, but I felt compelled to do so in this case and I’m still not completely sure why.
It has stirred up memories and feelings that I usually keep stuffed way down deep. I keep them there because they’re painful. I spent a lot of years with those feelings just below the surface, anesthetizing them with a daily dose of alcohol so I wouldn’t have to think about them, and avoiding those people who were constant reminders of past mistakes.
I’m so grateful that I’m not in that place anymore. Though I still have feelings of anger, sorrow and regret over past mistakes, it doesn’t lurk just below the surface anymore clouding every waking moment disallowing me happiness. I’m grateful for my life, my family AND my mistakes. They are part of what made me the person I am today whether it felt good or not.
Some things you just have to let go.
(For more info on the image above, go here.) I love Suzanne W**lcott's stuff.